Hazuki Dojo

^How are you doing now?

I feel a bit frustrated. I should go do stuff but some stuff I don't want to do and others are exhausting stuff. So I can't really decide where to go and what to do. So I just sitt arond feeling unuseful and confused. Damn I hate days like these!

Just finished writing a cute love letter for my sweetheart. I am always kinda heartbroken since i had to go back to germany, but knowing i will return soon gives me hope. Wish i could hug her right now.

^Love letters are awesome So you aren't in germany all the time now?

Ryudo wrote:Doc said my heart isn't looking to good. Said I could have a cardiac arrest at any given time. So I would be dead before I hit the floor

That's pretty bad. Hopefully you'll get the help you need before anything happens.

Frustrated I can't motivate myself more in free time.

Ryudo wrote:Doc said my heart isn't looking to good. Said I could have a cardiac arrest at any given time. So I would be dead before I hit the floor

Shit there's got to be something you can do. Is there any aid coming your way?

darkly wrote:^Love letters are awesome So you aren't in germany all the time now?

I am in Germany now. 2 weeks since I am seperated from my sweetheart, but i had to make my company sign an agreement and care about some stuff here, basically I am just selling everything i own and try to get a job in Tokyo or Yokohama.
I phone with her every day and i write her loads of emails and letters. But of course still it hurts to not be able to hold her in my arms. I hope i can return to Japan at end of october for a while. And after that, maybe stay there forever? At least i hope i can.


And of course best wishes for Ryudo. At least here in germany it may not always be true when doctors say you might die from a heart attack every minute. They said that to my aunt already 30 years ago and she got impressive 73 years old. But like the last 5 years were not so great, she suffered a lot did have to take a dozen different drugs every day and could barely walk 3 steps. I think if she did listen more carefully to the doctor 30 years ago maybe she could have changed her life and would still be alive. She just never managed to lose her overweight, could not blame her in her last years as she was barely ever able to even move. I hope your doctors are as wrong as hers were and that you manage to get the power to fight against it. Just never give up hope, never give up yourself.

I feel really tired.

Embarrassed. Also tired.

^ We've got your back whatever it is

^ Damn right!

Pretty decent, not really loving my 10-6:30 shift at work but at least it's almost the weekend.

Rushed, trying to get two weeks worth of stuff done in one week.

Sterling wrote:^ We've got your back whatever it is

Brotherman wrote:^ Damn right!

Thanks you two.